Balance

So no pics with this one...but at my institute class tonight and this whole semester, we are talking about balance in your life. Tonight we talked about physical balance and the importance of eh hem, sleep. (among other things) Anyway, this is a HUGE challenge for me to have balance in my life in all areas, like physical, emotional, spiritual, and intellectual. I mean really, who knows a mom of toddlers who doesn't call other adults on the phone just to have some intellectual balance? Not that figuring out 5 million ways (no I am not exaggerating, have you met my 3 year old?) to answer why the sun is hot, isn't intellectually stimulating, but sometimes we just need to talk with grown ups. Also I should maybe read something challenging or stimulating...

And emotionally balanced? Oh there is such a thing? Sorry but I have completely forgotten there is even the possibility of this. One of the things we talked about tonight is that all the areas need to be in balance to help any area that is out of balance. THIS is my ticket, I think. If I work on not being so exhausted, run-down, intellectually and spiritually starving, maybe I can get this impatient, grumpy mama under control.

So...here is my goal. You are supposed to write down goals and tell other people so that you actually get them done, or so you feel guilty when you don't. But either way it's worth a shot right?

Physical goal: I get two because this is my worst area. I can't realistically sleep more right now, so it's more about the other parts. Make one healthi-ER food choice every day, like if I want ice cream, I'll have yogurt, or instead of a cookie I will eat a healthy muffin, or a carrot (don't laugh, I might actually eat a carrot, what's up doc style). Do one physical activity every day (dancing with the boys in the living room, going for a walk, sledding, etc.)

Spiritually: I am doing really well lately, knock on wood, I don't want to jinx myself. But I have actually been reading my scriptures almost daily (huge improvement) and praying. I have also sat through an entire sacrament meeting twice in the last month (a HUGE feat), and have gone to my institute class 3 weeks in a row. So, my goal is to keep doing this stuff. Actually my one new goal is to start teaching my kids more about the gospel, maybe reading to them from the book of mormon illustrated stories or something, or listening to primary songs a little....

Intellectually: Really I am too tired to exercise much in the way of brain cells. So...I will play tetris! :) I am a tetris addict. I don't know if this will really count or not, and I probably won't do it. I am a dry tetris-aholic. I know myself well enough to know I can't play it. It's opening a doorway I don't want to open. I get out of control. It's a good thing I don't feel this way about Ben and Jerry's. :)

So hopefully if I get these things in balance, then the emotional part will catch up. I know I am much less grumpy when I am well rested. Well rested you say? How does a mom with two toddlers get well rested? Truth? We don't. We just like to dream about being well rested. Dreams which are often cut short by crying babies or people checking out of hotels at random hours of the night. Oh wait, that's just me on that second part.

Well another point we talked about in my class tonight was that you have to take care of yourself first. The whole airline oxygen mask thing. I think this is a struggle for pretty much every mother I know. But I am going to try to not feel guilty when I do something for ME. I think I do a pretty good job of taking care of me, as much as I can, take baths, relax, get baby sitters when I can to get a break, eat a treat (no this does not conflict with my physical goal, the guest speaker in my class tonight said not to deny yourself when trying to eat healthier, or you will resent your diet choices and they won't last! So you have to make changes you are willing to do the rest of your life! I am willing to eat treats the rest of my life! I know I am a cheater, but it works for me...), watch a movie I like, read for fun (when not falling asleep), spend time with friends, girls night out, etc. So I am going to do that now knowing that I HAVE TO, and my kids NEED me to.

There you go, ramblings from an over-tired-newly-single-mama.

William and his teeth...

So, two days after Christmas, William went to Primary Children's to have anesthesia to get a cavity filled. The dentist discovered that his teeth are very weak and brittle and he had 8 pits where the enamel didn't form completely on his teeth. Not cavities (but he had 5 of those as well), but developmental pits. So, on top of this bad news and huge wake up call, he had what they call emergence delirium, when he woke up. Which means he went relatively psycho. He attacked me for about 15 minutes or so, tried to pull out his IV, and was thrashing around and screaming. Well, I gave up and Jason came in and within 30 seconds he was calm and quiet and drinking his slushee. Not fair. I lost it. It was a difficult day. Losing it and crying at the hospital brought out so many other emotions and made for a tough day. I figure I am allowed one tough day out of a month. So...who knows...somehow we will all get through it.

William is a cute guy though, and he is very photogenic. These pics are from surgery day. He has no recollection of them actually fixing anything, he thinks he never even went into the room with the big light (OR) and he doesn't remember freaking out as he woke up either. Good thing. We can all forget that part.





I know the last one is blurry, but Will has developed his camera smile. That's it. So cute.

Thanks!

To whoever the anonymous donors were to me at Christmas time. I have no idea if any of them read this, probably not, but if so, you know who you are. I had 3 anonymous Christmas cards delivered to me with $. It made the Christmas season so much smoother for me. I was able to get a new camera and start taking pics of the kids again. Here is the evidence of that! We had a good Christmas, spending it at Jason's house with the Santa Tornado as we called it. Santa was generous this year and the boys got spoiled. I think because William is now old enough to anticipate Santa coming, we took it and ran with it. He got a bunch of costumes since he is very into pretending, and most of them have weapons because he is having fun with that too. If he doesn't have a fake gun, he'll run around with the pole that keeps bad guys out of the sliding glass door, or a spoon or whatever, and shoot you with that! Hopefully this weapon fascination won't last long, or maybe the kitchen that Santa brought the boys will also help tone them down. :)

Happy New Year!

I need to post more despite the fact that sometimes life is difficult and I don't know what to say about it. I will say that my wonderful friends and family mean more to me than they will ever know and it is only by relying on them that I make it through the tough days. That being said, not all my days are tough, most are pretty good. I am just adjusting and finding my way and rediscovering what I want out of life.

So...to catch up...Our trip to N. California was amazing. The redwoods are definitely worth the 16 hour drive, with two little kids and not an adult to chat with. I am grateful for portable DVD players, even though the one I bought off craigslist for the trip out, died at Truckee and then I had to buy a new one for the ride home. It works very well though and I even watched a movie while I was in the bath the other day and loved every minute of it! It was great to see Rachel (who I need to call) and just get a little break before I came back, started working the next day and moved a week after that. Since vacation time is hard to come by at my job, I am re-living this vacation over and over and over until I can get another one. Which may be in the fall this year. My kids enjoyed the beach, they had never seen one before. Will loves that he got to see where Nemo lives. We relaxed a lot, played at the park, which had a river that was great and shallow and calm and a river beach of nice perfect rocks for throwing into the river (one of Will's favorite things to do in the whole world.) They loved it, got soaked and cold and had a blast.

Rowen had a few accidents when we were there, falling down about 12 stairs, slipping off the cooler in the kitchen, his face colliding with the cabinets and the kitchen floor. But overall, we had so much fun. Rachel makes wonderful homemade food and inspired me to eat better and more fresh, home prepared meals. Oh, and she bakes! Banana bread, pumpkin cookies, and more, just in five days we were there. Maybe I should move closer! :)

Rachel took most of these photos, obviously the ones with me and the boys, and she does a great job. I have many of them framed in my house!